When Things Fall Apart

You are the sky. Everything else is just the weather. — Pema Chodron

It’s another day in your stressful and unforgiving life. Even though everything is better relative to last year or two years ago, deep inside, you are thinking;

What is the next thing life has got in store to f**k me over?!

There almost always is something, and it’s about to happen any moment now. How do I know, you ask? Because it happens to everyone regardless of their race, background or wealth. For some reason, people think having money will solve all their problems. It never does, and it never will.

CALMNESS IS UNDERRATED

The media wants you to panic. There’s always something to be scared of; every time I go online, I see news about record-high interest rates, how monkeypox might be the next pandemic, and the emerging signs of the next tech bubble.

Perhaps some of those stories should be valid concerns, perhaps not. But let me ask you a question — what is the use in panicking over something that hasn’t affected your life directly?

I choose to live by a guiding principle: If it hasn’t happened to me directly, remain calm, and even if it does, remain calm!

Choosing to remain calm doesn’t mean I am not concerned; it doesn’t mean I’m not terrified.

Life’s decisions are mostly based on emotions; if you feel a certain connection to a car, you buy the car; if you feel like having a certain kind of food, you order or cook the food. etc

But when you encounter bumpy situations in life (when s**t hits the fan moments), it is advantageous to remain calm, switch to a logical mindset and not let your emotions drive your decisions and actions. Aside from doing something you will regret, your entropy level will be so high it will make it hard to engage your logical mind.

The emotional route is like quicksand; the more you wallow in your emotions, the further you will sink.

I’m not here to tell you things won’t fall apart because they will. Instead, I’m telling you to embrace things falling apart and practice the right way to react when they eventually do.

LIFE IS FULL OF UNCERTAINTY, ACCEPT IT AND LIVE IT.

Fear, hopelessness, and uncertainty are all words that evoke strong emotions in the human soul. But I am here to tell you to accept, bask and learn to thrive in it because it will never go away until you die.

Sticking with uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, and learning not to panic, is the spiritual path. — Pema Chodron

I have got two tips for you, and I want you to take them to heart:

Seek discomfortOnly to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible be found in us. This is the spirit of true awakening. Let yourself be vulnerable.

I know it’s painful to get uncomfortable; but as Tom Bilyeu said: Embrace the pain and welcome it like an old friend. Humans believe they aren’t designed to withstand pain, but you underestimate the power of the mind because things falling apart is not your death sentence; it’s merely a test in the game of life.

Thinking that we can find some lasting pleasure and avoid pain is what in Buddhism is called samsara, a hopeless cycle that goes round and round endlessly and causes us to suffer greatly. There is no 24/7 Nirvana — why you may ask, we are all fragile creatures. Today we are here, and tomorrow, no more! — Pema Chodron

When emotions fail you, let your logical mind take over — By all means, grieve, cry, scream and let it all out. But know that sometimes the greatest pain in life gives birth to the greatest gift. But you can only attain that gift if you pick yourself up and engage your logical mind when things fall apart.

I wish you the best in life but know that things will fall apart and when they do, find your greatest gift.

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Yusufaolodo

Yusufaolodo

Embrace the failures in life. It’s all part of the journey